Sexually Loose Husbands, Submitted Wives

Sexually loose husbands are everywhere these days. Many of them arrogantly showcase the other women to the knowledge of their wives, yet away from the scrutinizing eyes of the larger society. Of course, the cases of cheating husbands are not new phenomenon in many societies around the world, what is of great concern is the high level of arrogance with which some men are involving in the immorality today, and their wives are not able to do anything but stay mute. Many of the women who are married to these promiscuous men are aware of their husbands’ unfaithfulness, yet they remain committed to the marriages and stay silent about the infidelity of their spouses. Most of the women do not want to expose their shame and embarrassment, so they choose to remain committed to the deceitful relationships. In fact, evidences are documented in several blogs and websites about the multiple irregularities of famous sexually loose husbands who take undue advantage of their wives while cheating with the other women. What’s more worrisome is that in many instances, some of these women have been pacified and conditioned to lie in defense of their adulterous husbands. Consequent upon these experiences, some of these subdued wives are languishing behind the closed doors of guilt and despair. Following this irregularities, many of these women are now living in the shadow of their lives risking their health, well-being, and losing their self-esteem and confidence in the process. The great challenge today is that these lifestyles are very much active in the houses of worships and virtually practiced among prominent leaders of different Church groups or organizations. There are so many sexually loose husbands that are salivating and begging for extra-marital sex with promissory notes or incentive offers across the world. They have corrupted their lives and ministries and every day, they are working additionally harder to clean up their tracks and hide the evidences from the general public. Nevertheless, the age of technologies has made it impossible to hide behind the shadows today. I want you to learn how to uncoil your life and unchain your purpose and destiny from the snares and tentacles of adultery through this epic spiritual and practical guides. In this masterful creative work, you will embrace the courage and confidence to release the spirit of adultery and break the binding – ruling power over your life and household. The spirit of betrayal is commissioned and delegated to reduce the moral sanctity of your marriage to a mere defiled sanctuary.       Love must understand self-sacrifice or it’s only a package and baggage of lust. There is no worship without holiness, therefore, gifts are not the alternative expression of the life of love. Love is a life poured out in honor or memorial so there is no duplicity or distributed affections. Marital love is tailored-fit for a husband and a wife, and when we create illegitimate extensions to apportion love to outside seekers, we destroy the faithfulness and loyalty to sacrifice our lives like Christ died for the Church. This is an abortion or hemorrhage of love. Inordinate affection is a breach of divine orders – so it’s interfering with or trespassing into forbidden territories by violating the oath of marital vows. Lack of love is a dishonor of the marriage vow, which is why the compensation of great material gifts never heal the wounds of broken love relationships. The oath of marriage is not an addendum, but a constitutional instrument created by the Institutor of marriage. Marriage is standing before God in eternal oath so our witnesses and testimonies of infidelities are bad records in our marital report cards. Marriage without love is like a life without blood or spirit! Spirit is the air that propels life in the spirit realm even as blood is the fuel that fans the rhythm of the physical life. The appropriation of love according to divine order heals the eternal memory of hurtful marital abuses or the wounds will open to rejection and welcome the torment of oppression. Wrongful relationships only breed the ground for hurt and pain, and the roots increase and multiply the effects to impact future generations. The questions anyone reading this article would want to ask are:

• Why on earth would any woman subject herself to such open humiliation in the hand of someone who proclaimed to love her?
• What could be responsible for this abnormality?
• Why are women subjecting themselves to unhealthy abuses and non-dignifying marital conditions?

Let me briefly share with you some of the reasons why some women are choosing to remain in such unhealthy relationships, despite the psychological and emotional trauma they experience on regular basis. Afterwards, I will show you some tested and trusted approaches through which women can break free from the psychological and spiritual deficiencies caused by unholy compromised marriages. Why do women remain committed to adulterous relationships? Ideally, no woman in her right senses would want to share her husband with the other women. He is a sacred property belonging only to her and vice versa. So, when a woman gives up her defense to put up with a serial womanizer without raising her voice, then something is fundamentally wrong. There are several factors why a woman would want to tolerate a sexually loose husband. Here are some of such factors:

1. Lack of Self-esteem

Many women who stay in such abuses are lacking self-esteem and true spiritual confidence. Such women see themselves as being inferior and less worthy, so, whatever their husbands are doing cannot be questioned. Some of these women even consider themselves lucky to have married such a man who could have gone for someone they consider to be better than them. In these kinds of homes, the husbands are lords and their decisions, including going out with other women, are unquestionable. The wife believes she has no say, and thereby accept the situation as her fate.

2. Shame from Social Stigma

Some women, because of the fear and shame of what people will say if they find out their husbands are cheating on them, have simply decided to go mute about their husbands’ extra marital affairs. This is a self-inflicted injury. These women will continue to suffer the trauma and agony alone behind closed doors as they constantly make efforts to hide the true reality of their relationships from friends and family members, who could have perhaps offer a helping hand. The husbands will definitely take advantage of their silence and continue deeper into their adulterous lifestyles unabated.

3. Fear of Divorce

Due to the fear of social stigmatization that is always associated with the status of divorced women in most societies around the world, women often shy away from any conditions that might trigger a divorce. Therefore, to avoid divorce, many women do everything, including enduring their husbands’ infidelity. And many women have lost their energies, well-beings, self-esteem and confidence.

4. Fear of Financial Security

Many women who are married to successful sexually loose husbands cannot sacrifice their outlandish lifestyles and quit the relationships because their sustainability depends heavily on the men’s wealth. Thus, for the fear of not losing their financial security, these women prefer to suffer great internal struggle. The epidemic of extra marital affairs are so open today that some high-class marriages are devalued with compromised gifts to pacify and take away the rights of the vulnerable wives to oppose or reject the loose husbands’ immoral disability and dysfunctionality.

5. For the sake of their kids

It is also common to see women who could not bear to have their children live without a father-figure make resolutions to remain with sexually loose husbands. They believe it is better for them to sacrifice their own happiness for the good of their children. This might not be the best option! There are countless women who have chosen to live solitary and unfulfilling lives for the sake of their children’s well-being.

6. Lack of Spiritual Authority and Power

When a woman lacks sufficient spiritual authority and power, she might also be lacking the strength to battle some of the challenges of life, thereby compromising her marriage with a spiritually deficient husband. Such women languish in lamentations and sorrows resulting from the non-challant attitudes of their husbands without knowing the way forward or how to liberate themselves from the marital bondage. The above-mentioned factors are some of the reasons many women are subjecting their lives to untold abuses from sexually loose husbands without making any meaningful efforts to fight back or at least seek a divorce to liberate themselves. In reality, none of the reasons mentioned above is potent enough to make a woman compromise her happiness – spiritual and physical well-being. If you are a woman enduring a bad relationship because you are afraid of being alone and poor, or fear of shame and embarrassment, I want to tell you that you’re losing more (your entire life) by remaining in unhealthy relationship. I want you to know that with a good support system through friends and family, many women have been able to create an active and a meaningful social life without a spouse until the LORD sent them the right husbands. The Way Out The essence of this article is to help you to liberate yourself from indecent and unfulfilling relationship. The plan of God for you is to build a fulfilling marital life. Anything short of this is not acceptable if you are a true child of God. Therefore, wake up to reality. Come to your right senses and demand your right. You should never settle for less. Your goal is to establish a Godly relationship with your husband without a third party standing in-between you and what is your sacred property. If you are reading this article and you have been lock-up in this type of relationship. If your husband is a serial womanizer who does not have regards for your person. If you have been wallowing in self-pity, regretting why you have chosen to marry your sexually loose husband.  It’s time you consider a better alternative to your present life. I challenge you today to take steps towards liberating yourself. Activate your life again and quit living in the shadow of the man who does not really care for your spiritual and physical life. Here are some of the things you need to do if you really want to liberate yourself from any relationship that is filled with emotional torture and agony:

1. Confront Your Husband with the Facts

If you really love your husband, your first response should be to try to salvage the relationship before doing anything drastic. If you want to do this, you should not act on impulse, instead you must gather your facts and confront him with the facts. Allow him to tell his own side of the story. Stand tall and tell him to his face where you’re sure he is lying. As long as he is not abusing you physically or verbally, give him some time to decide if he is going to come out clean for the interest of the relationship or if he will continue in his adulterous lifestyle.  

2. Talk to a Professional Relationship Counselor

It is emotionally and psychologically draining if you find out that your husband is engaging in extra marital affair. So, it is important that you get a professional (spiritual and physical) help at this stage. It does not matter whether your husband quit the extra marital affairs or not, you need a relationship counselor to walk you through the overwhelming and emotional challenging situation. Prayerfully work with the counselor to see what options are still available for you in your relationship. While you are working with the relationship counselor, keep studying your husband’s actions to see if he wants to move on with or without you. Do not be afraid of the worst case scenario.  

3. Decide When to Give Up

No matter how much you love your husband, you must also love yourself. If he is not ready to turn a new leaf and quit his adulterous lifestyle, you will have to give up on him for the sake of your own well-being. You should not continue to care for someone who does not give a concern about your own emotional feelings or spiritual and physical state. You should not abide outrightly with infidelity for the sake of anything including your children. It is not even recommended that you raise your children in such a home where your dignity is not valued and respected. You have a better chance to raise your children in the way you want them to go (in the way of the LORD) when you are emotionally and mentally stable than in a home where your emotion is being trampled and abused on a regular basis. It is “living in bondage” to stay with a sexually loose husband because of his wealth or any other benefits. So, if he chooses not to mend his ways and approach the relationship with a genuine intention to reconcile with you, it’s time to give him an ultimatum and move on. 

4. Give an Ultimatum and Be Ready to Move On

If your husband fails to stop his adulterous lifestyle despite all your efforts to remedy the situation, it’s time to disengage. Remaining in such relationship will not help you in any way. You must protect your life from further deterioration. It is not possible for you to continue in a relationship with a third party wedged in the middle. Remaining in such relationship will torment you psychologically and emotionally and leave you both spiritually and morally bankrupt. It will dwarf your spiritual growth and maturity and destroy your purpose and destiny in life.

5. Start New Life

There is always a new beginning – a time of fresh renewal. A season and moment to move things forward – take a new step. Do not sit down to wallow in self-pity, shame, or regret. Consult with your counselor on the way forward and prayerfully focus on a new career or path of life. The most important thing is your own freedom. You cannot flourish and fulfill your purpose and destiny if you remain in a relationship that is spiritually deficient.   End note No relationship is worth more than your happiness. If a man does not respect you enough to honor your emotional feelings or value who you are, he does not deserve have you as a wife. Never, ever, keep quiet and stay put in a relationship where you are not appreciated and cherished. If someone does not love you: you must at least love yourself. Do not be afraid of the shame that often associate with divorce, but rather lean God for His support and guidance. Your LORD is your strength! Make a decision to withdraw yourself from unworthy relationship with a sexually loose husband today!